Category Archives: Narcissism
Etymology: Uncertain, the name Narcissus has come to be associated with a species of daffodil. Pliny the Elder wrote that the flower is named for its fragrance. There’s a connection to “narko” meaning “I grow numb” and not for mythological figure.
Alternate Spellings: Nárkissos
Narcissus hailed from Thespiae in Boeotia and was very well known for his beauty. He was so proud of his beauty that he held disdain and scorn for those who professed their love for him. This of course, attracted the attention of Nemesis, the goddess of retribution who sought to punish Narcissus for his arrogance.
Father – Cephissus, a river god or Endymion by Nonnus in his Dionysiaca
Mother – Liriope, a nymph or Selene by by Nonnus in his Dionysiaca
There are several variations to the story of Narcissus.
For one, with Narcissus’ parentage of a minor river god and nymph, Narcissus himself is a minor god. This makes it a little more likely for why other gods, albeit minor take an interest in him.
Conon was a contemporary of Ovid. Unlike Ovid’s telling of the story, in this one, there is a young man by the name of Ameinias who falls in love with Narcissus. Now, Narcissus had already spurned the love and advances of several other male suitors already. So Ameinias is just merely the latest of who’s been turned down.
What makes Ameinias different from the others is that Narcissus gives him a sword. Ameinias prays to the gods, specifically Nemesis, that Narcissus would get his comeuppance and feel all the pain that he has caused others. The prayer said, Ameinias takes his own life on the steps to Narcissus’ home with the sword given to him.
In answer, when Narcissus walks by a pool of water, he sees his own reflection after stopping to get a drink. Falling in love with his own reflection, Narcissus kills himself as he’s unable to have what he wants, his reflection.
Or, when Narcissus realizes that he is cursed for the humiliation he inflicted on Ameinias, he kills himself. From Narcissus’ blood, a flower springs up, bearing his name.
Sometimes it is the goddess Artemis who answers Ameinias’ call for vengeance.
By Conon’s account, Narcissus is still in the Underworld, gazing at his reflection in the waters of the Styx river.
Edith Hamilton’s Mythology
One story mentioned in this volume is that Zeus had created the narcissus flower in order to help Hades with kidnapping Kore (Persephone), the daughter of Demeter down to the Underworld while she was out with friends gathering flowers and playing. When Kore went to pick the strange, new flower, that is when a chasm leading to the Underworld opened up and Hades carried her away to become his wife.
Ovid’s Metamorphoses has the version of Narcissus’ story that most people are familiar with.
The son of Cephissus, the river god of the Boeotian river and the nymph Liriope, Narcissus was born in Thespiae, Boetia. Liriope was worried about the fate of her baby boy and took him to a blind seer by the name of Tiresias. The seer told Narcissus’ mother that the baby would enjoy a long life so long as: “he didn’t get to know himself.” In some accounts, in response to this prophecy, Liriope removed all mirrors to try and prevent Narcissus from ever catching sight of his reflection.
When Narcissus reached sixteen years of age, he spurned the love and advances of all those, men and women alike, who showed any interest in him. Yes, the ancient Grecian heart-throb leaving a trail of broken hearts behind him without any second thoughts.
Narcissus is out wandering the forests one day with some friends hunting deer when Echo, a mountain nymph or Oread sees and instantly falls in love with him.
What’s not told when starting off with just Narcissus’ side of the story is that Echo had been cursed by Juno, Jupiter’s wife after finding out that Echo was only running distraction to keep her from finding out about her husband’s affairs. Angry, Juno curses Echo that she can only repeat what someone else has said.
With that context in mind, when Narcissus gets separated from his friends and calls out: “Is anyone there?” That Echo can only repeat back what he says with: “Is anyone there?”
This startled Narcissus who then asked: “Come here.”
Because of the curse, Echo could only respond with the same “come here” reply.
When no one came out into the glade he was standing in, Narcissus figured that the other person must be moving away from him. So, he called out again: “This way, we must come together.”
Echo, taking this to heart as confirmation for her love, called back: “We must come together!” As she came running out, ready to throw her arms around Narcissus.
On seeing the nymph running towards him, Narcissus became affronted and pushed Echo away exclaiming: “Hands off! May I die before you enjoy my body!”
Hurt, all Echo could respond with was: “Enjoy my body.” Before she turned to flee back into the woods, rejected and humiliated by Narcissus. By this account, Echo wasted away, her body becoming stone until only her voice remained.
Narcissus would have his own comeuppance coming, for he continued to spurn the advances and loves of others. Including the previously mentioned Ameinias, who in his love-sickness, called out: “O may he love himself alone and fail un that great love.”
Nemesis, the goddess of revenge heard Ameinias’ cure and decided to respond. She cursed Narcissus, attracted him to a pool where he fell in love with his own reflection. Not realizing it was merely an image and unable to leave the beauty of his reflection, Narcissus lost his will to live. He stared at his reflection until he died.
Echo, her own love unrequited and unable to do anything, watched on as Narcissus pined away for his reflection.
It is said, that just before he died, Narcissus told his reflection: “Oh darling boy, I loved you in vain, good-bye.”
Echo repeated the words: “Good-bye.” As she was now completely stone and unable to do anything else.
When the nymphs came to gather up Narcissus’ body for funeral, it was gone and in its place was a flower.
Nemesis – It should be noted that she is sometimes seen as an aspect of Aphrodite and not a separate entity.
Another note, Ovid connecting Echo to Narcissus’ myth seems to have been his own invention. However, its now the official one.
Pausanias’s Guide To Greece
In a Greek travelogue, Pausanias retells Narcissus’ story in which he ends up falling in love with a twin sister, not his own reflection. When his sister died, Narcissus would go to a spring and look at his reflection, imagining that it was his own sister that he saw. Narcissus eventually dies, pinning away for the loss of his sister.
Pausanias doesn’t think the story of Narcissus falling in love with is reflection and not being able to recognize it as such is unlikely.
Mirror, Mirror On The Wall….
One idea I came across says that Narcissus’ story may originate in an ancient Greek superstition that it is unlucky, possibly even fatal, to see one’s reflection.
Other sources to Narcissus’ story have him drowning in the pool as he tries reaching for his reflection.
That’s a bit heavy and deep to take. Ovid, Parthenius of Nicaea and Conon all have versions of Narcissus’ story where he commits suicide as he’s unable to what he desires, that being his reflection give love back.
After Narcissus’ death, a flower sprang up in the very place that he died. This flower of course bears Narcissus’ name and is a genus of daffodil.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Or Narcissism. Obviously, Narcissus’ story is the basis for a personality disorder in which a person is very self-absorbed, vain and everything is always about them whether that is their own physical appearance or public perception. Psychologist have studied this disorder for years.
A little bit of self-care and self-love is good. We should care about ourselves and want to do good as well as look good. When taken to the extremes and a narcissus is that self-absorbed with themselves that they don’t care about others or make everything about them, then you get a problem.